28 Days

WOW, in 28 days from right now, I will be in the hospital getting ready for my surgery. I have been waiting for this for SOOOOOO long, that it still just seems so surreal. I can't believe that this is actually going to happen. I am excited yet PETRIFIED at the same time. I have only been put under once, and I was only 5. I had to have dental work done, go figure. I wouldn't let the dentist near me, so they had to put me under. That time it was with "gas", so I have NO idea how I will handle the anesthesia.

To tell you the truth, that is my biggest fear right now. I get sick with ANY sort of medicine, so I know that it will NOT be pretty when I come to. But what REALLY scares me is that I have watched WAY too many shows on TLC and Discovery Channel. There are those people that only part of the anesthesia works on. So they are paralyzed, but they can feel EVERY THING! What if that happens to me? Could you imagine going through jaw surgery and being able to feel it? I know that the chances of that are SOOOO slim you can't even count them, but still. I will have to talk to the Anesthesiologist about that one.

Another thing that has me nervous is my heart. I have several heart problems. So they will need to put a catheter into one of my veins to monitor my heart that way, instead of the normal way. This way there is no delay in the response time and they can react quicker if they need to. Now I have never even had an IV, so having them put a big catheter (ok, it really isn't THAT big, but it seems like it is) into one of my main veins is very scary.

Did you all worry about little stupid stuff like this? I'm not worried about the pain after the surgery so much as the pain before (the heart thing) and the anesthesia. I just worry too much, but I guess it's just normal. I'm just glad that I have you all to get this out too. Since most of you have already had your surgery or will be having it soon, you totally understand where I am coming from.

Ok, I think that's it for now. I will update again when I have more appointments. Which I don't have to see my ortho until after the surgery. That just seems SO weird.